Friday, May 21, 2010

And They're Off!

I have never been a very competitive person.  I like winning-sure, but I am also a very good loser.  I have recently realized that I have been automatically entered into a new competition.  The "mom competition".

I have found that being a new mom and having other mom friends is a little like being in high school again. The comparisons start early: Bumper or no bumper; formula vs. breastfeeding; organic fabrics vs. regular; making your own baby food vs. buying jarred…the list seems neverending.  Once the baby is born, it’s milestones this, milestones that! I never knew I could be so obsessed with when someone would decide it was time to sit or sleep through the night or eat solid food!

I heard about this competition and told myself,  "I will never let myself get worked up about this type of thing, I will raise my baby the way I find right."  I'm finding now this is one tough competition to escape.  With all of the mom blogs, message boards, Facebook, etc, it's difficult not to be bombarded with every little detail of other's lives.  It's hard not to read about other babies achievements or about their parent's opinions on parenting. 

It's hard not to brag.  They are our children, they do amazing things.  It's a pretty great feeling to have when you child discovers or accomplishes something new. But at times I find myself comparing Jack to what other babies his age are doing. 

What I have realized now is that there is no 1st, 2nd or 3rd place in this "competition".  Being first doesn't matter.   Babies are just like us; little people with different strengths and weaknesses.  We all get to the finish line, some of us just take a different path to get there. 


Her Momma said...

Good post!! I'm glad you're over the competition with other moms. I'm kind of opposite of what you describe as I've never cared what others thought of me or what others have or are doing - and I apply the same mentality when it comes to Lovie... The bottom line (to me at least) is that YOUR BABY is all that matters! Love him, hug him, admire him... And really, what's not to love?! :) TGIF!

Lu said...

I feel the same way completely! I really hate it when other people (especially those who don't have kids) will make it seem like my baby isn't doing exactly what he needs to be doing because "so-and-so's kid is already doing this and that." I have to remind myself often that just so long as my baby is happy and healthy, he's doing just fine!

Stopping by from New Friend Friday. Nice to meet you!

Julie said...

Oh your little one is so handsome. You don't need to compare or anything, it's one day at a time and you'll learn as you go. What Sam (or Mike, or Alex or....) does today doesn't mean your son will do until next week or already has done. It's not a race and like you said it's not a competition. My son is now 18 and he didn't get his first tooth until he was almost two, he didn't talk until after that but now he's an Eagle Scout, going to graduate with a B average and is working full time with his grandpa and dad in the family business so one day at a time. Plus your a mama, bragging rights just happen to come along with that. So smile, brag all you want about your handsome son and enjoy every single second you can, they grow up way to fast.
Take care and have a blessed day today.

liz said...

a lot of that goes away with baby #2, too. they you'll just be comparing #2 to #1, and not even think about anyone else's kid. :)